Two funny happy New Year cards surrounded by confetti and stars

The countdown to the New Year is officially on. And with it, you’re promising new beginnings, new resolutions, and new positive habits. And the first item on your list? Keeping things light.

This year, you’re setting out to bring more joy and humor into your life (and in turn, into the lives of those around you). And sending your loved ones a funny happy New Year card is going to be your first step toward making good on your resolution.

To start your year on a light note, keep reading for several funny messages to write inside a New Year’s cards and send to those you love. From playing jokes on New Year’s eve, making a keep it light New Year’s resolution, and bringing a little humor into new beginnings, here are 21 different messages to include on a New Year’s card.

Funny Messages to Include on a New Year’s Eve Card

Pop Fizz Contrast Card with space to write a funny happy New Year message

Design: Signature Greenvelope

While New Year’s Eve is, without question, the final farewell to another year past, there’s no reason you can’t bring a little humor into the evening. Collectively wave goodbye to another year with friends by adding these funny quotes, puns, and messages about New Year’s Eve to your New Year’s card:

  • For New Year’s Eve, want to just come over and bake stuff? I’ve never baked anything in my life nor do I know if my oven works, but I’d choose you and burnt cupcakes over long lines and $100 covers.
  • Sometimes, I look at the lines on New Year’s Eve and think, “Where are their coats? It’s sub-zero temperatures and they’re standing there in tube tops!” Then I remember how we did that … every single year. #SurvivalOfTheFittest
  • Want to stay in and watch movies together on New Year’s Eve? My resolution this past year was to save money, but it wasn’t that successful. I’m looking to save my $100 cover as one final hurrah.
  • Sometimes, I look at New Year’s Eve dresses and think, “Aw, that’s cute — I can’t wait to wear that!” but one second later a voice in my head says, “Nope, it would look better on your BFF.” So … matching dresses this year?
  • Our New Year’s Eve countdown is officially on. And as a last-minute attempt to fulfill my resolution from last year, I’m trying to learn from my past mistakes. On that note, rip my credit card from my hand when I hit an $80 tab.
  • It’s going to be a great year, my friends. At midnight on New Year’s Eve, let’s kiss all of our poor outfit choices goodbye and put on our pajamas.

Funny Happy New Year Messages About Resolutions

Champagne Coupe card with space to write a funny happy New Year message

Design: Signature Greenvelope

Making a New Year’s resolution is one of the most widespread traditions of this holiday. In your attempt to keep this light-hearted, there’s no need to put pressure on friends or family members to keep their resolutions. Instead, let them know that you love and appreciate them just the way they are with these humorous New Year’s quotes:

  • This year, my New Year’s resolution is to accomplish the New Year’s resolutions I set last year, which have been following me around since 2015.
  • My New Year’s resolution is self-acceptance. And therefore, I accept myself just the way I am — with absolutely zero need to incorporate a lifestyle change.
  • On the last day of the year, I want you to know how much I appreciate you believing in me and never once doubting me. In looking at the resolutions I set last year, you really, really should have doubted me.
  • You know, I love you but I question your judgment when you don’t second guess the New Year’s resolutions I set. I’m batting 0 for the past five years, so your faith in me doesn’t go unnoticed.
  • My New Year’s resolution is to spend more time with friends. So should we go get our new gym memberships then collectively not use them together?
  • I decided my New Year’s resolution is to be more supportive of my friends. Therefore, I support you in every new habit you want to make, and I’ll support you when you inevitably fall back into the same person I love so much. See? I’m already doing it.
  • We could try this whole thing where we say, “Our New Year’s resolution is to not set resolutions,” but we tried that last year, so maybe we should get some new material. On that note, I’m thinking improv.
  • My New Year’s resolution is to eat more green things, and I already know I’m going to need some food coloring.
  • There’s no New Year’s resolution that could possibly make me love you anymore. Unless your resolution is to pay for our surcharged Uber home.
  • I just want you to know that I’m here for all the positive lifestyle changes you want to make. So in supporting your Marie Kondo resolutions, know that you are welcome to practice on my apartment.

Funny Happy New Year Messages About New Beginnings

New Year's Cheers card with space to write a funny happy New Year message

Design: Design Swift

You and your besties have been friends for years. You’ve seen one another grow up, get new jobs, start families, and land promotions. Here are a few humorous ways to raise your glass, once again, with those who stood by your side through so many changes throughout the years:

  • So, should I be the one to dish out the “We’re awesome just the way we are” when we want to return to our old habits in three weeks? Or do you want to take the lead this year?
  • I just want you to know that there’s no one I’d rather have a fresh, clean start with than you. And for that reason, I’m coming to your apartment on Tuesday to do laundry because laundromat prices are killing me.
  • I’ve had so many new beginnings with you they’re all starting to run together. Or maybe that’s because we drink champagne whenever we commit to them.
  • There’s no one I want to do this “Brand new year, brand new me” stuff with more than you. I mean, we’re on our twelfth year of doing this, so we don’t have the best streak going. But this year I’m sensing a change.
  • In all honesty, we’ve had so many new starts together I’m beginning to lose track. We started college, started new jobs, started paying back our student loans. Can we skip the fresh starts this year? All this change is really taking a toll on me.

This New Year, Have a Laugh on Us

At Greenvelope, we support you in all your New Year’s quests. We hope you make new friends, dance your way through new milestones, and laugh your way through all of it.

Keeping things light-hearted is something we could all use more of in our lives. So if you’re looking to bring a little humor into the next twelve months, we’re here for it. With funny holiday greeting cards, hilarious Christmas wishes, and comical birthday cards, we have card designs that can roll with all of this year’s punches.

From all of us at Greenvelope, have a fun-filled New Year!