16 Wedding Ceremony Ideas for Non-Traditional Couples

Planning a wedding is fun, meaningful, joyous, and let’s be honest — a bit overwhelming! One common stressor for a lot of couples is thinking of wedding ceremony ideas that aren’t run of the mill.

Luckily, we have ideas for how to personalize your wedding ceremony. From alternative rituals to readings to layout suggestions, you can make your wedding stand out with these non-traditional wedding ceremony ideas.

What Are Unique Wedding Ceremony Ideas?

Come for the cool unity ceremony ideas, stay for the rule breaking and meaning making in this list. Be inspired by these 16 ways to make your day unique and modern. 

1. Have a Reading From an Author or Poet You Love

Customize your wedding ceremony by incorporating your favorite passage, poem, or lyrics that encapsulate your relationship. It doesn’t have to be serious — a pop song, a funny monologue from a movie, or a sweeping declaration of love from a romantasy book are all valid if you like them. Pick something that will make you both smile and holds some meaning to who you both are.

The reading can also celebrate the freedom you have to be married. Many queer couples do a reading from Justice Kennedy’s summary of the Obergefell ruling, which contains this stunning set of words: “Marriage responds to the universal fear that a lonely person might call out only to find no one there. It offers the hope of companionship and understanding and assurance that while both still live there will be someone to care for the other.”

2. Do a Ring Warming Ceremony

Adopt the Celtic tradition of passing the rings from guest to guest. Each guest holds your wedding rings and offers a silent blessing: a wish, a positive vibe, or a prayer for the couple. The rings snake their way to the front in time for the ring exchange. Make sure to tie the rings together and place them on a cushion or in a box so they don’t get lost or dropped.

If you have a bigger wedding, place the rings on a special table as guests enter the ceremony. Have signage and a ring guardian to explain what to do (and watch over the rings). Loved ones can hold the rings for a moment to offer their warming encouragement, and the ring guardian can deliver the rings before you tie the knot.

3. Have a Unity Sand Ceremony

Plan a sand ceremony to symbolize coming from two different places and becoming a united duo. All you need to do is have separate containers of sand and pour them together into a larger vessel.

You can use colorful sand to represent yourselves and even have your children contribute their own sand to represent your new blended family.

One of our favorite spins on this unity ceremony idea is to bring sand from the area you each live and mix it together.

Any way you pour it, a sand unity ritual is meaningful in the moment and makes a beautiful keepsake to display in your home together.

4. Have a Hand Fasting Ceremony

A hand fasting ceremony is a centuries-old practice to solidify your new marriage. This ritual involves wrapping a cord or ribbon around the couple’s hands, and it’s where the phrase “tying the knot” originated. This ceremony has long been observed in Celtic and Chinese communities and carries deep cultural significance.

Get all the details and adapt it to your unique love using our guide on the hand fasting ceremony.

5. Break Wedding Party Rules

There are so many wedding traditions that bind a couple to gender norms, color codes, and strict conformity. Remember that there are no rules!

You don’t need bridesmaids and groomsmen — you can have bridesmen and groomswomen. People on either side can wear dresses, suits, or jumpsuits. Color palettes can be free and wild, and the wedding party can even wear white if you want (gasp!).

Do whatever makes you happy! Toss out the rulebook, and focus on what would make your day perfect.

6. Skip the White Dress

While we’re on the topic of wedding clothing, who says you need to wear a white dress or black suit? We’ve seen gorgeous wedding outfits in all colors of the rainbow. Patterned suits, floral gowns, short dresses, red jumpsuits — it’s all allowed on your big day.

7. Hire a Live Musician

Live music will bring an unforgettable imprint to your special day. Ditch the aux cord and all the technical complications that come with it. Hire real, live people to play your ceremony music.

A singer and an acoustic guitar will bring a down-to-earth energy, and a string quartet will be sweeping and romantic. If the wedding budget is running low, pick a musically inclined friend who can do some covers of your favorite love songs and ask if that can be their wedding present to you.

8. Reimagine the Ceremony Layout

Some of the coolest wedding ideas we’ve seen lately have been a nontraditional ceremony seating arrangement.

Try a center stage with circular seating so you can both see guests in your eye line during the ceremony. For the processional, you can enter simultaneously from different sides of the circle if you don’t want to go one at a time.

Or, keep the classic center aisle but turn the chairs inward. You, your soon-to-be-spouse, and your wedding officiant will stand in the middle, giving everyone a great view.

P.S.: You don’t have to enter the ceremony separately. A lot of couples find comfort and beauty in walking down together to start the ceremony as one.

9. Break Wedding Song Norms

Instead of a moody playlist for a tear-filled walk down the aisle, what about some high-energy music? Get everyone dancing early with a celebratory processional instead of a tearful one.

This swap can be perfect for brides and grooms who feel awkward about tons of people silently staring at them while they try not to trip.

10. Create an Anniversary Wine Box

During the ceremony, place love letters you wrote to one another in a box with a bottle of wine from that year — a bottle of your favorite spirit if you’re not big on wine. After a set number of years, open the box, share the bottle, and read the letters you wrote to each other.

This anniversary box can also be done sans-alcohol. Place letters and keepsakes from your venue, take a spontaneous Polaroid of one another during the ceremony (yes, in front of everyone!), and add a nonperishable food item from the day.

11. Plant a Tree

Symbolize the growth of your relationship with a tree planting during your ceremony. You can come back to the site year after year and see the tree grow. Make sure to clear it with the venue first, of course! Pre-dig the hole so you can protect your outfits and make sure the spot is ready.

This physical representation of your love will be something you can hold onto for the rest of your lives.

12. Share a Drink

Treat yourself to a nice drink during the ceremony that doubles as a symbol of your unity. Share sips from the same cup to show the love and trust you have for one another. This can be something like wine, whisky, or Martinelli’s. You can also each bring a spirit from your hometown and mix them together into a shot glass. Follow it up with reading your own vows.

13. Tell Your Love Story

For many non-religious couples, building the ceremony script can feel difficult since many traditional wedding ceremonies are tied to spirituality.

Our advice is simple: Tell the story of your love. Write down how you met, what your first date was like, and how you knew you loved one another. Describe your favorite things about your partner. Your officiant can weave your story together into a ceremony script that will have everyone swooning.

14. Have Whoever You Want for a Ring Bearer and Flower Girl

The title says it all. Break the rules on ring bearers and flower girls! They don’t have to be your little nieces and nephews, or even a family member at all. Make the ring bearer your college roommate. Make the flower girl into a flower boy, and have your best friend scatter flower petals — the guests will get a kick out of it. You can even have your dog deliver the rings!

15. Memory Sharing

Instead of the officiant being the only one who talks, try one of these two ideas for getting more people involved in the ceremony:

• Introduce members of the wedding party by having them share a story from when they met you. This puts stories to the faces standing up there and celebrates the people who brought you to this day. Have them keep it to 30 seconds — this isn’t a wedding speech!
• Invite guests to stand up and share a memory, wish, or piece of advice for you as a couple. This Quaker wedding tradition is a beautiful inclusion of every guest and works best for intimate weddings.

16. Get a Custom Song Made

Songfinch crafts a one-of-a-kind song based on your love story. You tell them about your memories, stories, and ideas, and they’ll use their community of songwriters and musicians to write and record a song for you. 

You can play it while you walk down the aisle or after you say “I do.” You can even surprise your partner with the song as you walk down the aisle. Make your wedding day truly one of a kind!

Make It Yours

Wedding planning doesn’t have to stick to the same old routine and traditions if they don’t fit your desires as a couple. Make your wedding yours, from the first look to the wedding vows to the cocktail hour and beyond. 

You’re almost to the big day! Check out our Stationers blog for even more wedding inspiration.